Daniel Radcliffe is in some new horror film and I just realized I will never be able to take him seriously.

“JUST USE YOUR MAGIC, HARRY!”

Sometimes I feel like I’m in a box, away from the rest of the world. When I say shit like “I hate people” or “I’m socially retarded”, I feel like that box gets smaller. Besides feeling stupid for saying it when it’s not true. I complain about not having a life when it’s my own fault. Many times I’ve turned down an invitation to some party that may be fun or whatever just because “I’m socially retarded”. Today I realized that unless I drop this notion that I’m anti-social and socially retarded and all that stuff, I’ll stay like this always. Being shut away from the world and all is just not a good way to be. I look back on all the times I’ve told people that “I hate people” and I feel like such an idiot. How can you hate people? The world is filled with them. There’s bound to be millions that you’ll like.

• Feeling lonely? Get a cat.
• Need to make a tough life decision? Pet a cat.
• Taking over the world? Pet a cat while laughing evilly. 

Once you learn about the Slender Man, you’re doomed. You’ll see him everywhere. You’ll tell yourself you’re hallucinating. But you’re not.

The Slender Man senses your fear. He THRIVES on it. Those nights when you sit there thinking about him? He LOVES that. He’ll find you.
One night, the Slender Man will enter your home. You’ll hear it. He wants you to panic. He’ll laugh at your futile attempts to escape.

It’s best to relinquish any hope of escaping or surviving. The chances of that are slim to none.

On other occasions, the Slender Man will enter your home quietly. He’ll sneak up on you. There are a few signs that he’s entered.

You’ll feel the room get colder. The lights dim. Your pets won’t see him.

There you are, surfing the web or whatever it is you’re doing. You’ll feel an increasingly dark and heavy presence. You think nothing of it.
This false sense of security won’t save you. He’ll make his presence known. He’ll make a noise or drop something.

He wants to see your face distorted with fear. Once again, you’ll think nothing of it. Soon after that, he’ll grab you.

The Slender Man’s touch will drive you mad. At this point there’s really no sense in fighting it.

Your only chance of survival is to LEAVE. Get out of your house. Those late night noises? THEY’RE WARNINGS.

If you do survive, consider yourself lucky. If you’ve recently read about him then you’re not so lucky. Good luck surviving. YOU’LL NEED IT.

To those who have yet to read about the Slender Man, heed my warning and just don’t do it.